freak-out: verb- overwhelmed, scared, overjoyed, in love, concerned, anxiety, hopeful, tearful, out of control, submissiveness, getting fat
Yeah, it’s that last part that threw me for a loop.
Before I had children, I was an active runner, hiker, diver, tennis player, swimmer and overall hyper person.
I was a nanny for ten years before I had children. I was the nanny who jumped on the trampoline, chased and was chased, played horse, climbed trees, pulled wagons, played tag and roller-bladed. I loved it all and never for a moment thought “Hey, I’m in great shape.” I just played with all my heart. I loved my little chick-a-dee assignments.
So, when the counselor and I married and decided to have our first baby, I didn’t think how pregnancy would affect me physically. I wanted a baby more then anything.
I found out I was pregnant with my first child on Earth Day 1999. This date was a sign to me that I was having a very special child, a child that would love the earth.
I threw up the first 4 months. I didn’t run, hike, dive, pick up a tennis racket, swim or do anything hyper. I couldn’t. My body forced me to slow down.
This “slowing down” is still one of the biggest challenges of pregnancy, but somehow, I’ve adjusted. I’ve learned what my body can handle and what pushes it say; into pre-term labor.
This right here is a questionable, but necessary.
The ceiling fan was literally dropping dust every time I turn it on. How can I live like that?
Last night I read the sweetest and most sincere blog about this very topic. My friend, Angela Henrie, mother of 8, is taking charge of the last part of my “freak out” definition. She wants to take off the weight of having all her babies.
I am so impressed.
The thing is, she isn’t trying to impress anyone. She is so real and down to earth it leaves me feeling like I’ve just read my own journal entry about my own weight loss goals. She’s doing her best to slim down & get back to her dream of being a ballerina. You can read her darling blog, The Ballerina Project here.
It’s so wonderful and I am cheering for her ultimate success.
I was at Walgreens last night buying jelly beans (hey, I don’t have to diet just yet) and I purchased the latest SELF magazine.
Because the cover features Hayden Panettiere.
This girl has sweet significance to me because if I were to cast an actress to play the lead role in my novel Colors of the Sea, it would be her.
She’s darling, famous and a major ocean lover.
She’d do justice for my character, Winona Ray.
It’s funny though, because with all this young lady has accomplished, the interview is on dieting.
Are you kidding me? I know as a nation we are obsessed with this our bodies, but somehow it doesn’t seem to do her and her cause of saving the sea justice.
So, I open my bag of jelly beans and read through Hayden’s diet tips. I’ll be applying them soon enough, just not today.