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Tuesday, April 9, 2013

My Spiritual Journey to Weight Loss


We've all seen the cover stories on tabloid magazines showcasing perfect bodies with the headline “How I lost x-amount pounds” or “How I got my body back.”  The celebrity is sporting some string bikini or skin-tight dress, showcasing her glamorized thin body. That’s how society celebrates weight loss.  It’s something to be put on display. 

I've thought long and hard about sharing my current weight lost journey.  If it was a number’s game, it wouldn't be worth documenting, but my experience was somewhat different. 

Mine was a spiritual journey of loving myself and trusting in God.

Let me give you a brief summary of my battle with self-image and weight.  I was a chubby girl, heavier and taller then others my age.  I had a very heavy grandmother and always felt I was destined to inherit such genes.  I struggled with feeling fat and didn’t feel like I fit in with the pretty girls.  I started sports in jr. high and thinned out a bit, but still feel like I was different.  As a young adult, I maintained a healthy weight, but struggled with my self image and losing those last 10 pounds.  I think we all want to be thinner, prettier and more likable.  Even on my wedding day, I was worried about if I was thin enough; pretty silly when looking at the big picture of life.  Fast forward to having five kids in 10 years and I hadn't lost the weight associated with pregnancy.  I had a serious problem.  Sure, I tried eating less and working out more, but the scale wouldn’t budge.  I seemed stuck.


I remember thinking about a year ago “So, this is what it’s like getting older.”  I couldn’t run as fast, jumping on the trampoline with my kids was something I enjoyed any longer and nothing in my closet wanted to fit.  Should I settle?  Did I have a choice?

Then, one day while reading the scriptures I came across this Bible verse.

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die.
1 Corinthains 15:32
This scripture is also found in the Book of Mormon; Another testament of Jesus Christ.
 2 Nephi 28:7
Yea, and there shall be many which shall say: Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die; and it shall be well with us.

I’ve heard this scripture my entire life and always thought it pertained to those struggling with addition like drugs or alcohol, but this time when I read it, it seemed to speak to me.  Suddenly, I realized it pertained to me and my personal struggles.
 
What was I putting off in my own life, saying “Oh, I’ll get to that later, when I have more time, better resources, more money or more self discipline?”  In other words, what was I procrastinating in my own life?

How many times had I put off starting on a healthier eating plan because tomorrow would always come?

That’s when I realized today was the day.

A friend of mine had recently lost weight on the medi-fast program, so I found a weight-loss coach and ordered the food.  It started out simple enough with eating less and making better food choices when on the 4th day I said to the counselor “I’m so hungry I think I could eat off my right arm.”  I wasn’t sure if I could do it.  It was too hard.  Was it really worth it?  Should I believe the choices I make today were insignificant because I always had tomorrow to try again?  I had a critical choice to make.  Was today really the day I was going to make sacrifices?  I repeated the scripture again in my mind, over and over again, remembering how it had impacted me and really thought about what God would want of me.  What about people who are facing a serious addictions?  How difficult it must be for them to give up their substance.  I had such sympathy for them when it occurred to me food is an addition.  This was a very personal experience, especially when I recognized how my weight had influenced my self-image.  Did I want another day, another month, another year feeling like I wasn’t good enough?  The weight needed to come off for my personal growth.

I weighed in a week later and lost more weight then I’d expected.  Seeing such fast results made a huge impact.   It was still difficult, every day, every hour, sometimes every minute because I had to make conscious choices about what I could or could not put into my mouth.  I kept the scripture out where I could read it whenever I needed encouragement.  I went the entire Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas season making the necessary food choices to help me reach my goal.  Some days I cried; I was mad and it didn't seem fair.  I had cravings that left me dizzy.  I prayed and drank lots of herbal tea.  Other days I floated; I was sustained and felt like the luckiest girl in the world.  Food was losing control over me. I have never been into diet soda, but some days it was what I needed to get over the hump.

I remember about a month into the program, running down the street to my mom’s house when I noticed how easy it was to run.  I couldn’t believe how free I felt.  My legs were so easy to pick up and my body moved with less effort than before.  This was another motivating experience that kept me going.

I lasted on the program for 8 weeks before I pooped out.  The weight-loss process is mentally exhausting, but medi-fast rocks.  I couldn’t have lost the weight any faster.  I still have a bit more to go to get to my pre-pregnancy weight, but I am so happy where I’m at.  Everyday I thank Heavenly Father for giving me such a gift and when I am tempted to eat something that could compromise my success; I remember my scripture that kept me on track.   


Yea, and there shall be many which shall say: Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die; and it shall be well with us.

So, now that I've been through it what would I say to my pre weight-loss self?

There are many things I learned from my experience that I wish I’d known all those years I’d struggled.  
First of all, find a program that works specifically for you.  That way all your effort and dedication isn’t for nothing.  I spent a lot of time for decades doing things half-way.  I didn’t realize I needed to be 100% committed.  Did that cookie or extra bite really make a difference?  The answer is yes.  I never knew that. 

Second, there is a true start and stop date to dieting.  There is an end in sight.  I didn’t realize this, even while I was on the program and that would have helped.  I guess even while doing it I still didn’t really believe it was possible.  If I could have said “Eight weeks, Laura give it eight weeks,” I think I wouldn’t have felt so frustrated at times.  

Third, reward yourself with beautiful experiences, early morning walks, plant flowers, take pictures to document your process to see how far you’ve come and buy new clothes.  I started buying new outfits for date night and couldn’t believe when I started wearing smaller sizes. 

Lastly, don’t beat yourself up.  This process is difficult, but it’s worth it.  Celebrate even the smallest success.



23 comments:

  1. Congratulations on such a great journey!! I am one too that struggles with feeling less than I really truly am. I always feel like i'll start tomorrow cause tomorrow will come. I need to start now and it is my mind that convinces me otherwise. I know what I need to do but I convince myself to eat whatever I want and hate myself later. Thank you for the post it is very uplifting and encouraging. Food is my addiction too. So thank you!

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  2. Congratulations!! You do look amazing!!
    My sweet husband struggles so, with weight loss. A 2 time cancer survivor, his Dr. keeps saying, "I can take care of your cancer, but the weight is going to kill you" We try & we try...walking, better choices with food, yet it is so hard to conquer. (I recently lost 20 & am @ my goal ) I am going to look @ Medi-fast... Thanks for sharing your journey.

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  3. That was so tender and from your heart. I remember you in high school, you were always sweet and kind to me. I am proud of you. Living healthy is a constant challenge. But you are right the reward are so worth it. Keep up the good work. I love to check your blog and see what you are up to.

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  4. You look fantastic! You radiate health. And your gorgeous inside and out!

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  5. Congratulations with your great journey. I know so much struggle to face on losing weight, it is not that as easy. You shave patience and discipline if you want to success with that journey. And I am very much proud of you Laura cause you did it great.

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  6. This is such an inspiring story. I struggle with weight and I feel I'm letting life pass me by. I don't think I have a single picture with the baby because I hate the way I look. And I think "what will she think when she is older?" I know I cherish the pics of my mom and I when I was growing up. And she won't have that. Thank you for sharing.

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